An End-of-Year Reflection: Small Things, Systems, and the Courage to Rebuild

As 2025 comes to a close, I find myself holding a complicated mix of emotions: frustration, anger, disappointment—and, unexpectedly, a cautious sense of resolve.

I have watched the country I love change in ways that have challenged the democratic principles I hold dear. Legal frameworks once meant to protect fairness and accountability feel increasingly fragile. The gap between the wealthiest and the poorest continues to widen, not subtly, but

unmistakably. What has been most unsettling is not just the headline moments, but the accumulation of “small” concessions along the way.

We can give on this.

That won’t be too bad.

It’s temporary.

Each moment and shift, taken on its own, felt easy to dismiss. But together, these actions have quietly eaten away at something fundamental—at trust, at shared responsibility and at the social fabric that allows people to believe they belong to something larger than themselves.

Seeing systems and connecting dots quickly has always been my superpower. It’s also, at times, a burden. When you see patterns early, you grieve earlier too.

Truthfully, I have been relatively comfortable. I’ve worked hard, and live a comfortable life. Only recently have I begun to feel the personal impact of those incremental erosions—and of the much larger, more brazen grabs for power by entrenched leadership structures whose actions continue to shock even those of us who thought we were prepared. Like many, I underestimated just how far things could slide, and how quickly.

And yet—this is not where the story ends.

As we turn toward 2026, I am beginning to notice something else again: small actions. Quiet actions. Human actions.

I see it in the generosity of strangers as I stand ringing a bell at the collection kettle. I see it when people choose to stand up for someone who looks different or loves differently from them. I see it in the risks being taken, often without fanfare, to help women find access to critical healthcare and retain agency over their own bodies. These are not grand gestures. They are not perfect solutions. But they matter. Because systems break down through small acts of disengagement, and they are rebuilt the same way.

My work has long centered on recovery, particularly addiction recovery. But I am realizing that recovery is bigger than that. What we are facing, collectively, is a recovery of relationships, of credibility, of moral courage, and ultimately, of trust.

At Congruism, much of our work centers around our 3Rs:

• Repair relationships

• Restore credibility

• Rebuild trust

I believe this framework applies far beyond individual healing. It may be exactly what is required now at a societal level. Trust is not restored through rhetoric or dominance. It is rebuilt through consistent, values-based action, especially when it’s inconvenient or uncomfortable.

In 2026, my focus will sharpen. I feel a deep call to support women, particularly women in leadership. I believe that broader inclusion of women in leadership brings qualities our democratic systems urgently require. Not because women are perfect, but because many of us bring a deep practice in collaboration, empathy, long-term thinking, and resilience born of our lived experience.

This past year, I have been profoundly honored to grow my women’s circles. These are not transactional relationships. They are not built on quid-pro-quo or professional leverage. They are rooted in trust, mutual care, challenge, laughter, and belief. Women who see me, support me, and stand with me, not for what I offer, but for who I am. These kind of relationships have been rare in my life, and they are powerful.

I am also grateful for moments of deep personal connection:

• Gathering with my six brothers and sisters, perhaps for the last time in that configuration due to aging and circumstance. We reinvigorated family bond and discovered, yet again, how much more alike we are than we are different.

• Finding a neighborhood that truly feels like a neighborhood, where people look out for one another and largely share common values.

• Expanding my perspective beyond the U.S., experiencing cultures that prioritize longevity, resilience, and collective well-being, and in doing so, recalibrating what really matters.

And I am deeply grateful for my husband, who loves me unconditionally and fully accepts the strong woman I am, while always seeing and honoring the vulnerability I have beneath. He understands that there is a light within me that needs tending. When my outrage is sparked by egregious acts, he helps me channel that energy into impactful action rather than depletion or despair. His steady presence keeps me grounded, safe, and able to maintain my own resilience, so that my passion remains a force for good, not a cost to my well-being.

And always, I am grateful for our chocolate lab, who reminds me daily that joy is often found in the smallest, most ordinary moments.

This year has stripped away some illusions. But it has also clarified my purpose.

Recovery is possible. Trust can be rebuilt. Systems can change. Not all at once, but through courage, consistency, and countless small actions taken by people who refuse to disengage.

As we step into 2026, that is where I will be placing my energy: helping to repair what has been damaged, restore what has been compromised, and rebuild a fabric of trust—one relationship, one woman, one courageous choice at a time.

Where will you place your energy, your actions and your resolve?

With gratitude and resolve,

Martha

Founder, Congruism